# Men's Hair Loss > Coping with Hair Loss in Everyday Life >  Mother nature is a ****ing bitch!

## Breaking Bald

What kind of sick joke is this?? I am getting hairier everywhere but my head, starting to notice hairs on my back emerging  :Mad: 

I honestly can't do this, I don't feel like same person anymore. Everyday 'right don't think about hair loss, just keep going, focus' But I just crumble as soon as I look in the mirror  :Frown: 

The worst part is the loooong and sloooooww wait, knowing that it is only going to get worse and worse. Always wondering, when is it going to stop? How bald am I going to be? Is there ever going to be any new treatments? 

I just want to be who I used to be again.

----------


## BigThinker



----------


## Exodus

Breaking last year before Christmas I felt exactly like you and a part of me still does.

But you know what after getting the super short one, I kinda realised it's not going to be the end of the world. Yes I'll be bald, but if Im going down, Im going down fighting and trying. That includes medication, working out, etc (you know the drill lol).

You're the same age as me and from the same country so I feel I can relate to you. The bottom line is, get on a med you want and find a strategy to cope in the short to medium term (and if it means shaving no guard...then it has to be that).

----------


## Bobman

First, let me say that I totally understand your pain. I lost ALL my hair by the time I was 30 and started at 22-23.  Remember though, we cannot EVER control what happens TO US, but we ALWAYS have the power to control what things MEAN to us.  The meaning you give it will control your focus, your emotions, your decisions and your actions.

Let's start today by changing the meaning.  I'm not saying it doesn't suck...cuz I've been there and it's not pleasant.  So vocabulary is crucial in this step.  From here out try to use less negative emotional charging words.  For example, if you routinely say "I Hate that I'm going bald"...try..."I'm peeved that I'm going bald.  Sounds silly I know, but it works.  Sit down, draw a line down the middle of a piece of paper and on the left side list the words you routinely use to express your current state of disappointment.  On the right side of that line...for each word make up a new one...maybe even a postive to the negative which is the most transformational.

What I'm trying to offer you is to TAKE CONTROL of what you have control over...the meaning you give it.  This will put you in a better state to take a more positive action towards becoming a "Hair-loss Victor", rather than a sufferer.

Also, the best way to ask questions is to pay attention to how you're forming them.  For example:
1) _When is it going to stop?_ Change to: "What options are available to me?"

2) _How bald am I going to be?_  Change to: "Is there anyone out there that was once where I am who has overcome this?"

3) _Is there ever going to be any new treatments?_ Change to: "What treatments currently work well and might be good for me NOW?"

It's all about positioning yourself to be what you truly are, a powerful being that has the ability to change things.  And I believe that if a simple guy like me can...you certainly can.

I hope this opens up your eyes to your strength.  You're not alone in this thing and we are ALL here to help.

May this find you well and let me know if you have any questions.

----------


## UK_

Thats how the majority of us feel breaking.

----------


## Breaking Bald

I'm just having a bad day and very true BT lol. I mean seriously what is the reason for this ridiculous curse?

----------


## Assemblage23

Breaking bald, you havent started fin yet?

----------


## Breaking Bald

> Breaking bald, you havent started fin yet?


 Nah man, only minox. I still don't trust fin.

----------


## Kayman

> What kind of sick joke is this?? I am getting hairier everywhere but my head, starting to notice hairs on my back emerging 
> 
> I honestly can't do this, I don't feel like same person anymore. Everyday 'right don't think about hair loss, just keep going, focus' But I just crumble as soon as I look in the mirror 
> 
> The worst part is the loooong and sloooooww wait, knowing that it is only going to get worse and worse. Always wondering, when is it going to stop? How bald am I going to be? Is there ever going to be any new treatments? 
> 
> I just want to be who I used to be again.


 Break out the clippers and get rid of that long slow wait.

----------


## Breaking Bald

> Break out the clippers and get rid of that long slow wait.


 I just can't do it Kayman, I can't be that guy who was known for his awesome thick messy hair, to being 'the bald guy'. 'Oh have you seen X, he's lost all his hair', 'but he has awesome hair!'  :Embarrassment: 

I just can't bare it, I'm a guitar player!!! How am I meant to be a guitar god with a bald head!!! My hair was something that I was so proud of, it was something that I actually liked about myself, something that defined my appearance.

----------


## Breaking Bald

How can I go from that? 
...
To a bald guy!?
Look at it! It was so awesome  :Frown:  
I'm 22 for crying out loud! I'm not meant to be bald!! I haven't even had a chance to live my youth yet and everyday it feels like my vitality is vanishing right before my eyes...

----------


## Kayman

> I just can't do it Kayman, I can't be that guy who was known for his awesome thick messy hair, to being 'the bald guy'. 'Oh have you seen X, he's lost all his hair', 'but he has awesome hair!' 
> 
> I just can't bare it, I'm a guitar player!!! How am I meant to be a guitar god with a bald head!!! My hair was something that I was so proud of, it was something that I actually liked about myself, something that defined my appearance.


 Better to be the guitar player with the bald head than the one with the wispy thin hair no? Satriani,Nick Oliveri, Kerry King, Billy Corgan, Moby, Michael Stipe, Fred Durst all baldies, all good musicians with plenty of fans (maybe not Fred Durst lol). Yes the stereotypical rock star has the long locks but if its not happening its not happening, so may as well try and rock the bald musician look no? Better than being the "wispy" guitarist, or the "balding" guitarist. Just my two cents, I used to play the bass all through my twenties, unfortunately don't really get the time to do it now and the shaved head never really impeded my image or the bands image. I have a friend who still plays in a band and he's a complete slick norwood seven at age 34, he's a guitarist in a metal band and looks the part.

----------


## Aames

> 


 LMAOOOOO. If they ever discover how to transplant ass hair, I will have a NW-1. 

And damn Breaking, you had/have fantastic hair. God, I hate to see you not use treatments; slowly losing the battle and drifting away.

----------


## Breaking Bald

I know Aames, I had the kind of hair that even girls were jealous of  :Embarrassment:  it was beautiful. This change is too much for me to deal with. I started minox but I don't think I'll ever touch fin. 

I hear ya Kayman, maybe one day...Although at least all of those musicians got somewhere with hair, even Joe Satriani had hair when he started his career.

----------


## Aames

> I know Aames, I had the kind of hair that even girls were jealous of  it was beautiful. This change is too much for me to deal with. I started minox but I don't think I'll ever touch fin. 
> 
> I hear ya Kayman, maybe one day...Although at least all of those musicians got somewhere with hair, even Joe Satriani had hair when he started his career.


 I was hesitant too when I was considering fin. I was thinking the same thoughts you are. Eventually, I hit a breaking point and couldn't deal with it anymore. I'm a very depressed person and being bald on top of everything would have been the end of me. Now I'm on duta and doing okay downstairs so far.

----------


## Kayman

> I know Aames, I had the kind of hair that even girls were jealous of  it was beautiful. This change is too much for me to deal with. I started minox but I don't think I'll ever touch fin. 
> 
> I hear ya Kayman, maybe one day...Although at least all of those musicians got somewhere with hair, even Joe Satriani had hair when he started his career.


 Yeah true however they didn't let it affect their integrity as muso's right? The music came first, carried on as normal and things came good. I've never heard anyone say "Man that guys music was amazing but then he went bald and I lost interest".

----------


## Breaking Bald

> I was hesitant too when I was considering fin. I was thinking the same thoughts you are. Eventually, I hit a breaking point and couldn't deal with it anymore. I'm a very depressed person and being bald on top of everything would have been the end of me. Now I'm on duta and doing okay downstairs so far.


 I hear ya Aames, if the minox doesn't do much for me, I will probably turn to fin. I just can't live as a bald man. But I think you are mad going on dut  :Confused:  I hope you will be ok.

----------


## Breaking Bald

> Yeah true however they didn't let it affect their integrity as muso's right? The music came first, carried on as normal and things came good. I've never heard anyone say "Man that guys music was amazing but then he went bald and I lost interest".


 Actually someone made a comment about Billy's music heading down hill after he went bald, but who knows. I get what you are saying, but image is quite important for music even though it shouldn't be  :Roll Eyes (Sarcastic):  

I've always felt like I knew who I was meant to be and losing my hair makes me feel like I was wrong and I don't have a chance of becoming anything. It's really sad. I don't know if I will ever be able to move past this. I'm not looking for sympathy or anything like that but it's good to get it out somehow.

----------


## Aames

> I hear ya Aames, if the minox doesn't do much for me, I will probably turn to fin. I just can't live as a bald man. But I think you are mad going on dut  I hope you will be ok.


 I appreciate your concern, mate. And yeah, I definitely can't picture my life bald. I felt like the universe has taken enough from me, I can't let it take my hair/beauty as well. And yeah, part of me is worried about duta's long term effects but there's no sense in worrying about what has yet to occur or what may very well never occur. I've made my decision. Keep us updated on whatever you decide. If you do decide to go on fin, I advise you to take a break from the forums for a few weeks before starting and, for the love of all that is holy, don't go browsing propeciahelp. I'm convinced all of my initial sides from fin were a psychological result of me spending too much time on that site the night before my first dose. Feel free to drop by my duta log to see if my genitals fall off.




> Actually someone made a comment about Billy's music heading down hill after he went bald, but who knows. I get what you are saying, but image is quite important for music even though it shouldn't be  
> 
> I've always felt like I knew who I was meant to be and losing my hair makes me feel like I was wrong and I don't have a chance of becoming anything. It's really sad. I don't know if I will ever be able to move past this. I'm not looking for sympathy or anything like that but it's get it out somehow.


 Pretty much sums up how I am. Feel free to drop me a line if you want to talk.

----------


## baldozer

> Better to be the guitar player with the bald head than the one with the wispy thin hair no? Satriani,Nick Oliveri, Kerry King, Billy Corgan, Moby, Michael Stipe, Fred Durst all baldies, all good musicians with plenty of fans (maybe not Fred Durst lol). Yes the stereotypical rock star has the long locks but if its not happening its not happening, so may as well try and rock the bald musician look no? Better than being the "wispy" guitarist, or the "balding" guitarist. Just my two cents, I used to play the bass all through my twenties, unfortunately don't really get the time to do it now and the shaved head never really impeded my image or the bands image. I have a friend who still plays in a band and he's a complete slick norwood seven at age 34, he's a guitarist in a metal band and looks the part.


 And don't forget to include the Metal God, Mr. Rob Halford in that list, hehe!

----------


## Breaking Bald

Thanks Aames, good advice, best of luck. 

Baldness works in metal, but rock/blues/soul -which is what I play- not so much...

----------


## dex89

> How can I go from that? 
> ...
> To a bald guy!?
> Look at it! It was so awesome  
> I'm 22 for crying out loud! I'm not meant to be bald!! I haven't even had a chance to live my youth yet and everyday it feels like my vitality is vanishing right before my eyes...


 you went from thick gorgeous hair to a diffuse head? God, this is the reason why I take FIN. Man, This  is what scares the shiot out of me. Dam, it must be really hard for yeah breaking  :Frown:  you should reconsider FIN mate, it can probably bring that hair back. 

PS. I didn't know people from the UK drank Corona's, Cheers to that amigo  :Smile:

----------


## Breaking Bald

> you went from thick gorgeous hair to a diffuse head? God, this is the reason why I take FIN. Man, This  is what scares the shiot out of me. Dam, it must be really hard for yeah breaking  you should reconsider FIN mate, it can probably bring that hair back. 
> 
> PS. I didn't know people from the UK drank Corona's, Cheers to that amigo


 I know mate  :Embarrassment:  literally the thickest, nicest hair you could ever want. It's been really difficult to cope with and it all happened so damn fast, it just sneaks up on you. I don't blame anyone for taking fin, it will probably come to that unless I happen to be an amazing responder to minox  :Roll Eyes (Sarcastic): 

Corona's is good  :Wink:

----------


## 25 going on 65

I am no doctor and not qualified to give medical advice, and the advice I am about to give regardless could mess up your life, but:

Take finasteride. Every day.

----------


## BigThinker

> How can I go from that? 
> ...
> To a bald guy!?
> Look at it! It was so awesome  
> I'm 22 for crying out loud! I'm not meant to be bald!! I haven't even had a chance to live my youth yet and everyday it feels like my vitality is vanishing right before my eyes...


 God, do I know that feel.  I remember laying in bed with girls and having them obsess with the thickness of my hair - literally less than a year ago.  When I was in highschool, I was in different jam bands and had long hair down to my shoulders.  It was so much of my identity - this thick, dark hair.

Then, all of a sudden, I notice recession.  No biggy, I'm getting older.  Then It starts thinning and continuing to recede.  I'm suddenly drenched in fear and hopelessness.  Took me a solid 4 months to learn to cope, bounce back to my normal self, and invest what little hope I had in finasteride.

I swear, my shedding is almost non existent since I started 8 days ago (aside from the 2nd day, when I shed like a mofo).  Maybe fin isn't supposed to work that fast, but I swear I got a little bit of a nut ache and the shedding stopped.  Could be a placebo effects; I don't know.  But, I really have hope now, and the sides are thus far non-existent.  I'm by no means trying to persuade you to take fin - you know the risks and need to make the decision yourself.  I'm simply saying I felt like shit for a short while, bounced back, and made an educated decision.  I'm sure you'll do the same for yourself.

Good luck, compadre.

----------


## Exodus

I used to feel like this and I still do. I'd love to get my hair back and style it, cut it, j*** on it, whatever I used to do with it.

But at the same time, I've kinda accepted I'm never going to get _that hair_ back. It just won't. I've left it too long and well that's it. The most I'd accept is a more packed buzz because I prefer it this short as it's hassle free.

Failing that I'll go 0 guard. At the moment it's getting people to get used to me with short hair and having it look so sparse in the middle, I think once that journey has finished, I'll be a bit more relaxed about hair loss.

----------


## Aames

> I used to feel like this and I still do. I'd love to get my hair back and style it, cut it,* j*** on it*, whatever I used to do with it.
> 
> But at the same time, I've kinda accepted I'm never going to get _that hair_ back. It just won't. I've left it too long and well that's it. The most I'd accept is a more packed buzz because I prefer it this short as it's hassle free.
> 
> Failing that I'll go 0 guard. At the moment it's getting people to get used to me with short hair and having it look so sparse in the middle, I think once that journey has finished, I'll be a bit more relaxed about hair loss.


 What kind of sick freak are you?

----------


## Exodus

A realistic sick freak who isn't you.

----------


## Aames

> A realistic sick freak who isn't you.


 I am not realistic because I do not ejaculate on my hair?

----------


## Exodus

Oh come on it was a joke, like I jizz on my hair!

----------


## Aames

> Oh come on it was a joke, like I jizz on my hair!

----------


## Exodus



----------


## Exodus

Sorry for the earlier post Aames. Obviously the jizz comment was misunderstood. How is Duta treating you so far?

----------


## Aames

> Sorry for the earlier post Aames. Obviously the jizz comment was misunderstood. How is Duta treating you so far?


 It's all good, brah. I was just being antagonistic. Not too shabby. If it doesn't turn out and I get sides, maybe I can just shave and start enjoying life. I think I'm noticing a decrease in shedding though and my acne seems to be a lot better. Approaching two weeks on.

----------


## Exodus

I've started Fin and I'm gonna see how it goes. I mean I don't mind my shaved look really, kinda getting used to it. JDuffs posts in another section are pretty inspiring as he's got good results so they're a benchmark (and only in 3 months too). Are you using Minox as well?

----------


## Aames

> I've started Fin and I'm gonna see how it goes. I mean I don't mind my shaved look really, kinda getting used to it. JDuffs posts in another section are pretty inspiring as he's got good results so they're a benchmark (and only in 3 months too). Are you using Minox as well?


 Best of luck, man. I remember you being one of the hesitant ones so I hope it all works out for you. My current regimen is 0.5 mg duta, 2 ml minox per day, and Nizoral MWF. Just dropped topical spiro since it made my hair greasy and it smells like a skunk. Considering RU or topical duta in the near future. Trying to get my regimen to be as bare bones as possible. I would be very happy if I could maintain/regrow a bit with just oral duta.

----------


## BigThinker

> I've started Fin and I'm gonna see how it goes. I mean I don't mind my shaved look really, kinda getting used to it. JDuffs posts in another section are pretty inspiring as he's got good results so they're a benchmark (and only in 3 months too). Are you using Minox as well?


 That's news to me -- good luck.  Let us know how it goes.  I know I'll do the same.

----------


## jgold

I totally feel you I just turned 21 and I have diffuse thinning on top of my head. Diffuse is way worse than just a receding hairline, its ****ing depressing. It sucks even more because I have great hair just like you. I can completely relate bro it feels like my youth has completely become ****ed because of this. I don't know when yours started but mine did when I was 17 and I have thought about it every day since. I tried fin twice for months each time but it gave me sides and I got spooked. Minox didn't work for me and its a bitch to put on every day, especially when in my circumstance I have to spend like 5 minutes in the mirror just to situate my hair so that my thinness is somewhat concealed - minox just was too messy for me. And as far as the hunnies go, god damn I used to be confident and charming and I would consider myself quite a handsome fellow not to be arrogant, and now my confidence has completely evaporated gradually over time and I am totally introverted. I have to admit it is not just the hairloss that is responsible for these changes, however it is for sure the #1 thing that is to blame. Anyways just wanted to let you know that I'm in it with you man. Weel figure out a way, I am not going to give up my 20s (the time that is really going to form us as men) and let this **** it all up. I know in order to do this I will have to come to terms with it, however it just is not in me to do so - literally.

BTW if that is a giants jersey that your wearing in that photo. GO GIANTS BABY. #world champs

----------


## clandestine

No, diffuse it not worse than receding and crown loss, they are equally bad. Your appeal to pity goes out the window when you say this.

----------


## Exodus

Agreed, you can have bad recession or in my case diffuse on top which if left untreated becomes NW5-6 at a rapid rate.

----------

