# Men's Hair Loss > Coping with Hair Loss in Everyday Life >  Feeling crappy about my balding head

## baldindianman

Hi, I'm a 24 year old guy who has been feeling really depressed about losing his hair. It seems like women like big dominant guys with full heads of hair, but I'm far from it. I have no muscle, short (5'7''), quiet, and of Indian descent (girls don't like Indian guys). I also think I'm ugly, though my family says that I'm crazy for thinking that. My lack of success with women is also making me feel crappy about this and I'm scared that I will never be able to find a girl who likes me because all she will do is look at my bald head and my build and decide I'm not worth it. I'm currently lifting weights but I never seem to get anywhere with it besides strength gains, since I have a ton of trouble sticking with it. Other than that, I have a pretty good life (I'm in medical school, have great friends, hobbies, and a family that is proud of me) but it really sucks to know that no girl finds me attractive. Can someone please make me feel better? Thank you.

Here are a few pics of me:

http://imgur.com/a/k9pdS

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## jamesst11

We can tell you all you want to hear, but it's up to yourself to make you feel better.  I would seriously recommend therapy because of your self image issues.  I know, I am with you, a lot of us are, and it is hard... but, until you conquer this, nothing, including a full head of hair will make you feel better about yourself.  "Girls don't like indian guys"?  My sister is about to marry one.  Additionally, he is also 5'7", losing his hair and scrawny.  Why she loves him?  He treats her with respect and kindness.  He is confident, charming and has a PhD.  Don't get me wrong, any one that is on this forum is on here because of self image issues.  We all hate losing our hair.  But, you have to stop hating yourself.  Loser women only like men that are 6'0 body builders with thick heads of hair.  GOOD women like men primarily based on their confidence, kindness and drive.  You are a good looking dude.  Go get your confidence back.  If you want your hair, the only things that will help are minoxidil and finasteride.  that's all we have right now.

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## Artista

*Hi there Baldindianman,  I am in total agreement with  Jamesst11 suggestions and comments.*
*Baldindian'* you must be realistic about your life and not to become stressed out over that.
*Stress can and WILL make things unnecessarily worse for you!*
James was correct in also commenting that 
*" You are a good looking dude. Go get your confidence back..." 
That is TRUE bro!*
Also "... If you want your hair, the only things that will help are minoxidil and finasteride. that's all we have right now".
*Thats also true,*,,Ive been using *Finasteride for almost 2 years now*. *It IS* creating improvements for me..*with NO bad side effects.*

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## baldindianman

Thank you for the support guys. I'm just afraid that women will look at my bald head and small body and just say "no thanks." Basically, I'm afraid anyone who is a 6 or higher on the "looks scale" will be forever out of my reach, which means I'd have to settle for someone I'm not the least bit attracted to. Why date me when there are plenty of guys like me who have hair, are talkative, and bigger? It's nice to have a personality, but that alone isn't going to attract anyone.

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## jamesst11

Your way of thinking is just kind of off.  It's not true.  It's not accurate.  It depicts perhaps an image the media has implanted in your mind?  First off, based on looks, you could easily attract a "6 or higher" on the "looks" scale.  secondly, you have to remember that looks are HONESTLY a secondary characteristic in a women's mind.   I have probably 20 old friends that are women.  They are gorgeous.  They are "8-10's" on the looks scale.  They are ALL married to men that I would consider less attractive to you.  80% of them are married to men that are bald or balding.  They treat the women with kindness and respect and they have their shit together.  Despite being not that attractive, they have confidence.  I DON'T CARE WHAT ANY ONE SAYS on ANY OF THESE FORUMS.  It's is completely ridiculous to come to the conclusion that women are only attracted to 6'0" men with thick hair.  Is it preferable to them, yes.  But at the end of the day, I think the girls are tired of getting f*cked over by guys who got everything they wanted in life (socially) because they were blessed with perfect genetics. That's fact.

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## jamesst11

i.e. "imperfection is beautiful" - embrace it.

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## GoingGoing

Honestly, your hairstyle is so short, you might as well just buzz it. It would suit you! ...and you can then put these hair concerns behind you. Of course, everyone would love a full head of flowing hair (myself included), but no one is perfect and/or fortunate to be blessed with such genetics. I'm sure you have plenty of redeeming qualities that such guys that you're perhaps jealous of do not have. 

As for the working out, good for you for having the motivation to hit the gym/lift weights. If you're making no progress, it's all about diet (caloric surplus) and heavy weights to put on muscle, but that's another topic.

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## baldindianman

I buzzed it down to a 2 about a month ago, it just grew out a bit. Thank you for the reply but the thing is that redeeming qualities don't mean anything if the girl you're trying to date doesn't find you physically attractive, right? I just hope that I really am a good looking guy like the first couple posters said because I really don't know.

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## chriswalker

i would buzz it all off and hit the gym hard. girls love guys who are confident and strong. **** the hair.

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## OldSport

When you are balding or bald you are often operating at a disadvantage but it is not a show stopper and confidence can overcome it. That can be a chicken and an egg problem because hair loss hurts your confidence so you must stop that negative feedback loop. Fake it til you make it if you must. My hair loss used to stop me from success with women or at work, but now I hardly think about it, and consequently most women either don't care or if they do don't overthink it because I'm not.  I can say for sure it does not effect my work. I would like to have more hair, but I can honestly say it's not to be more successful in relationships or at work. It's more like having a nice car or a boat to me these days. There was a time I was severely depressed about it but at least these days there's many options to deal with it.

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## BaldBearded

I can offer no better advice than that already given by the honorable gentlemen. It's all about YOU and NOT your hair.

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