# Men's Hair Loss > Coping with Hair Loss in Everyday Life >  Coping with Hair Loss in Every Day Life

## clandestine

Sometimes it is hard not to become markedly depressed about hair loss.

I would like to put forth the idea of creating a new subforum. Something along the lines of '_Coping and Acceptance_' or '_Coping with Hair Loss in Every Day Life_'.

The new subforum would be a place of solace; of comfort and consolation. People could vent, others could choose to listen and respond, give input.

There is a whole lot of compassion on this forum, in my eyes such a subforum would be a welcome addition.

(i.e. Bald Truth Talk - Hair Loss, Hair Transplant and Hair Restoration Community > Men's Hair Loss > Coping and Acceptance)

Thoughts? Suggestions?

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## NotBelievingIt

I think its a good idea.

I'm "new" to my thinning.  Its so funny.  It took one picture this past summer that was taken looking at me from the left side that exposed, to me, the assymetrical loss going on.  I'm sure there was an acceleration that occured to this past Fall but I didn't exactly track it with photos.

Since then I've gone back through photos and realize it started sometime in 2009.  I was in Jamaica in Sept 2008 and there was maybe a teensy bit of thinning on the top back of my head, but my hair was also wet, in the pool.  Every other photo from that trip my hair is thick.  Unfortunately my "right side" is my "good side" so majority of photos of me are taken at that angle, and not from a top down...so all of the photos my hair looks fine from your typical family gathering photo.  Plus as I've said in other threads, I've always kept it short.

But a couple specific photos from June 2009, looking at them now knowing what to look for, you can see it happening.

Also, I'm disappointed my barber never said anything specifically about it (or any family/friends for that matter...)  I didn't really have a relationship with the barber per se.  It was a group of 4 people in a tiny little barbershop and I never cared who did my hair, I didn't get it styled or anything.  But again, knowing now that my hair was thinning, I can recall many times being asked "little longer on the top to comb" and always going sure...it never dawning on me why the question was being asked, just figuring that it was a courtesy type question or something.

So I switched to a stylist.  I know its going to be more expensive, but I also made it clear why I am going to them - I want my hair to look as good as it can as it progresses, however it will.  At some point I will likely make the decision to get it cut ultra short and the stylist will no longer be terribly necessary.  But right now unless you're on top of me, you can't really tell unless you're looking at me directly from the left and I'm not looking at you and then you still gotta be close enough to make it out.


I have my bad days and good days.  I had a lot of bad days for a couple months after 'realization' and I have less of them now, but it gets to me every so often.   Frankly I don't care that I'm going to lose X% of my hair - what I care about is _looking dumb_ while its happening.  The asymetrical crap going on is mainly the reason.

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## chrisis

I like the idea. Hair loss is affecting things I do on a daily basis now. I can't get my hair wet - so no swimming, and I avoid going out in rain without a hat/umbrella/hood. If my hair loses its style then I feel extremely vulnerable and paranoid that my hair loss is evident. I like to run, but now it must be with a hat because if I get my hair sweaty it looks bad.

 :Frown: 

Let's have somewhere to discuss these daily nightmares, with perhaps tips on how to cope with such situations and support where needed.

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## rupe

yeah mate, i think its a fantastic idea. it has also changed my life, i refused an outing to the beach with some friends as i dont want my hair wet when just 8 weeks ago i was going to the beach 5 times a week on my holidays. its srsly f*****. and when you have a bad hair day, like i did today and eysteray, it is terrible. feel worthless and feel like im expiring.

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## brooklynx24

Hi I agree.. I am a female and boy has HL really affected my life. I started with thinning over the years but now I have severe HL. I am now a hair wearer.  It has been very hard especially being a female because It is not as accepted.  Im not saying that as a male it is easier to deal with, but men can shave their head and get away with it. HL has made me a stronger person, but everyday I have to make sure I fight and not let it take over. It is not easy, but I try to remember that I am a healthy, beautiful person who has many things to be thankful for  :Smile:

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## clandestine

Glad you all feel similarly. This condition is indeed life-changing. Hair, in most cases, is a big part of who we are as a person. It is intrinsically part of our identity for the better part of our youth. Losing our hair can be seriously detrimental to our lives in so many ways.




> Hi I agree.. I am a female and boy has HL really affected my life. I started with thinning over the years but now I have severe HL. I am now a hair wearer.  It has been very hard especially being a female because It is not as accepted.  Im not saying that as a male it is easier to deal with, but men can shave their head and get away with it. HL has made me a stronger person, but everyday I have to make sure I fight and not let it take over. It is not easy, but I try to remember that I am a healthy, beautiful person who has many things to be thankful for


 Hair loss is never easy, no matter your gender. This is a tough battle, but all we can do is stay optimistic. Never should we let this affliction dictate how we live our lives. You are indeed beautiful, I'm glad you realize this. We all have many things to be thankful for.




> I like the idea. Hair loss is affecting things I do on a daily basis now. I can't get my hair wet - so no swimming, and I avoid going out in rain without a hat/umbrella/hood. If my hair loses its style then I feel extremely vulnerable and paranoid that my hair loss is evident. I like to run, but now it must be with a hat because if I get my hair sweaty it looks bad.
> 
> 
> Let's have somewhere to discuss these daily nightmares, with perhaps tips on how to cope with such situations and support where needed.


 Glad you support the idea. And I feel you man. Hair loss has literally become a daily struggle for me. Every time I see myself in a mirror or a window reflection I'm reminded of this affliction. My confidence, gone. Vulnerable and paranoid are very accurate words to describe what I've been feeling.




> I think its a good idea.
> 
> I'm "new" to my thinning.  Its so funny.  It took one picture this past summer that was taken looking at me from the left side that exposed, to me, the assymetrical loss going on.  I'm sure there was an acceleration that occured to this past Fall but I didn't exactly track it with photos.
> 
> I have my bad days and good days.  I had a lot of bad days for a couple months after 'realization' and I have less of them now, but it gets to me every so often.   Frankly I don't care that I'm going to lose X&#37; of my hair - what I care about is _looking dumb_ while its happening.  The asymetrical crap going on is mainly the reason.


 The rate at which hair loss can progress surprises me sometimes as well. Looking back at old facebook photos is terrible man, just terrible. Not the least bit helpful (obviously), but I try to stay off facebook most of the time anyway. Interesting that you're not necessarily worried about losing hair in general, but the issue of asymmetry is more bothersome for you.




> yeah mate, i think its a fantastic idea. it has also changed my life, i refused an outing to the beach with some friends as i dont want my hair wet when just 8 weeks ago i was going to the beach 5 times a week on my holidays. its srsly f*****. and when you have a bad hair day, like i did today and eysteray, it is terrible. feel worthless and feel like im expiring.


 Appreciate the input, rupe. Thanks for the support. You're not alone with what you're feeling. Hair loss is ****ed up for sure.

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## Maradona

> Glad you all feel similarly. This condition is indeed life-changing. Hair, in most cases, is a big part of who we are as a person. It is intrinsically part of our identity for the better part of our youth. Losing our hair can be seriously detrimental to our lives in so many ways.
> 
> 
> 
> Hair loss is never easy, no matter your gender. This is a tough battle, but all we can do is stay optimistic. Never should we let this affliction dictate how we live our lives. You are indeed beautiful, I'm glad you realize this. We all have many things to be thankful for.
> 
> 
> 
> Glad you support the idea. And I feel you man. Hair loss has literally become a daily struggle for me. Every time I see myself in a mirror or a window reflection I'm reminded of this affliction. My confidence, gone. Vulnerable and paranoid are very accurate words to describe what I've been feeling.
> ...


 Good call definitely need this sub forum.

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## rupe

What to do? I am feeling so depressed about this  :Frown:  About 4 weeks after stopping propecia (around 2.5 months ago), my hair has been shedding intensely and it has not stopped or slowed. It is like its progressing so fast, now i have to use toppik or you can see my scalp, and you can see my scalp anyway as toppik is not perfect. This morning I woke up and laid in bed for over an hour debating about whether to go to get a hair cut and get it cut short... which I ended up deciding to do but couldn't find anything on a Sunday. Its like cutting it short means I have accepted my hair is going, and I have no idea what it is going to look like short. Might it look even worse?! They say you shouldn't have long hair when thinning as the long hairs stick together and make it look thinner. Just over a month on minoxidil, nizoral and saw palmetto and now it has been 3 days on revivogen. Every time I shampoo my hair tens of hairs come out i will no longer use nizoral.

I know of someone who I hung out with once recently who went bald (he is friend of friend). We were going out, and he went in a seperate car, and the others were bitching about him, saying he said he had something called 'alopecia' and they told him to just to shave his head cos it will look better. Just went through his facebook photos and feel so sorry for him. I don't want this to be me next  :Frown:  I am trying everythign I can to stop it, I tried propeca but this is no longer an option. I wish there were others around with same thing, but you never see a young guy balding in the streets  :Frown:

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## Tracy C

> ...saying he said he had something called 'alopecia' and...


 All types of hair loss are called alopecia.  Male and female pattern baldness, hereditary hair loss, is called "androgenetic alopecia".






> ...I don't want this to be me next  I am trying everythign I can to stop it.


 You are wasting your time, money and hair on things that are not going to help you and avoiding the very things that are most able to help you.  This problem obviously does not bother you enough to take treating it seriously.  Sure we all wish there were more options.  We all wish there were better options - but at this time there aren't any better options.  The current proven treatments work for most people who use them and most people who use them do not experience side effects.  Use them or don't use them.  It is entirely up to do.

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## rupe

> You are wasting your time, money and hair on things that are not going to help you and avoiding the very things that are most able to help you.  This problem obviously does not bother you enough to take treating it seriously.  Sure we all wish there were more options.  We all wish there were better options - but at this time there aren't any better options.  The current proven treatments work for most people who use them and most people who use them do not experience side effects.  Use them or don't use them.  It is entirely up to do.


 What are you taklign about saying the problem does not bother me enough to take treating it seriously? What makes you say that?

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## StressedToTheBald

> I tried propeca but this is no longer an option.


 Think about beta sitosterol+saw palmetto.. I will soon finish my first month.. Its the best alternative to propecia. It sadly takes time but so does propecia.

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## rupe

> Think about beta sitosterol+saw palmetto.. I will soon finish my first month.. Its the best alternative to propecia. It sadly takes time but so does propecia.


 I'm not syre where to get beta sitosterol from? Does it come in tablet form? Revivogen contains this I believe.

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## Tracy C

> What makes you say that?


 You are wasting your time, money and hair on bogus treatments that are not going to help you and avoiding the treatments that are most likely to help you.  That is why I say that.

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## StressedToTheBald

> I'm not syre where to get beta sitosterol from? Does it come in tablet form? Revivogen contains this I believe.


 You can find it online pretty much anywhere.. there are many brands, I currently use Natrol, but there are other brands too. It comes in the tablet form. The most important thing is concentration per tablet - the more the better. I currently use 510mg of beta sitosterol + 300mg of saw palmetto daily.. I believe it has to be taken orally - to block DHT, I'm not sure that topical solution has any similar effect, or if it does.. it might be ways more limited. Also, certain more rare foods include beta sitosterol.. pistachios, avocados, almonds, canola oil etc.

Here is an interesting interview with a beta sitosterol user:

"*Here it is, what you’ve all been waiting for, the interview with WidowsPeak. If you haven’t heard of this fella, he’s experienced remarkable hair re-growth from primarily using beta sitosterol. Without further a do…

How do you think beta-sitoserol has helped you to regrow your hair?*

I believe that beta-sis works by blocking the binding of 5ar to testosterone to make DHT. This process still happens, so the body gets some DHT (which it needs), but not enough to kill hair follicles. This allows the hair to regrow.

*How long was it before you started seeing significant regrowth?*

I started to see hairs regrowing within a few weeks of taking beta-sis. It took about 6 months before I could see that I had hair regrowing about 1/2 inch below where my hairline was. Many of the hairs had no pigmentation, so I dyed them black and was able to capture hair regrowing about 1/4 inch down on film.
That’s how it’s been for over 2 years. I get 1/2 inch of regrowth in the temples, the 1/4 inch nearest the hairline shows up in photos and the other 1/4 inch shows up on film 6 months later.
So, everytime I post pics there is actually more hair regrowing than what you’re seeing, which is how I’m able to predict more regrowth every 6 months. That will stop, once I get back to a straight hairline, or however close I can get to that. I think I’ve always had a slight widows peak, but time will tell.

*Did you get any side effects (positive or negative) from taking beta-sitoserol?*

I noticed an increased libido almost immediately. I also noticed that when I first started taking beta-sis, my scalp got really oily. A week later, I noticed that my temples were starting to itch like crazy.
The oily scalp went away within about 3 weeks. The itching continues to this day, but is a lot more mild. Since the itching happens before an area regrows, I actually panic if I don’t feel at least a little itching everyday.

*Do you think beta-sitoserol will work for everyone?*

I don’t honestly know. I think that 60&#37; of users responding positively is a fair number. Propecia, which works in a similar way, but is much more powerful, has about an 80% success rate.
The thing that I will never understand is….I’ve read accounts from at least 3 diferent people who were using beta-sis and had hair regrowing, but then quit because of fears about this or that. Beta-sis is in fruits, vegetables and grains. Have you ever been to the doctor and had him tell you that you were eating too many fruits and vegetables? Of course not.

*What is your supplement regime (quantities / timing / brands / cycling)?
*
My regimen:
Twinlabs Cholesterol Success, 450 mg of beta sitosterol a day for 3 weeks, then 225 mg a day for a week, every month
Now Foods, Eco-Green Multi Vitamin
Now Foods, Spirulina, 500 mg
Now Foods, Grape Seed Standardized Extract, 100 mg
Now Foods, Glucosamine Sulfate, 1,100 mg
Now Foods, MSM, 1000mg
Now Foods, Zinc Supplements, 50mg
I take my supplements on an empty stomach first thing in the morning and then exercise for an hour.
A big part of my regimen is the following:
No shampoo
No sex
No junk food
No meat
No alcohol or drugs
No caffeine
Please understand that you don’t need to take the same brands of supplements that I do. My local health food store just happens to carry the NOW brand.
Also, if you’re a carnivore, you’re probably getting enough zinc in your diet and over-supplementing with zinc can block your bodys’ absorption of copper.
Lastly, the spirulina is for the B12 that I don’t get from veggies and the glucosamine is for my back.

*What sorts of foods does your typical daily diet involve?*

I eat 3 small avacados for luch almost everyday. They are high in beta-sis (75mg beta-sis per 100 grams of avacado) and glutathione (an essential amino acid that has anti-aging properties).
Alot of my diet is geared towards my 18 years as a vegetarian, so I eat things like the grain quinoa (keen-wah) to get all my proteins, I eat some soy, beans, fruits, veggies, brazil nuts (another complete protein). Lately I’ve been eating goji berries (another complete protein with 18 amino acids), as they have a polysaccharide in them that naturally boosts the bodys’ Growth Hormone levels.
I try not to eat after 8pm at night, as that can cause your IGF levels to spike, making you obese.

*How often do you wash you hair and what with? Do you use hot, cold or warm water?*

My hair is essentially self-cleaning, so I only rinse it about once every 2 weeks with cold water. Cold water forces toxins out of your body.

*Do you exercise — if so what exercise for how long and how frequently?*

I ride my bike for 1 hour in the morning and 1 hour at night, as it is my only means of transportation to and from work. I ride up and down some very steep hills, so I think that’s as much exercise as I really need, although I do kung fu a few nights a week.

*What are your sleep patterns?*

I’m up at 6:30 am and in bed by 11pm on weekdays. On the weekends, I tend to stay up later and sleep in until 11am.

*Do you do any scalp exercises?*

I tried them for 6 months and got nothing except for increased wrinkles in my forehead. More power to ya, if they work for you, but nothing regrew hair for me until I found beta-sis.

*Do you use any topicals?*
No.I have used Apple Cider Vinegar and beer to wash my hair when I first quit using shampoo, almost 2 years ago.

*Any other advice or tips for wanna-be regrowth folks out there?*

Taking beta-sis regrew my hair in the temples, but I was still losing hair in the crown. This didn’t stop until I gave up using shampoo. Not using shampoo, or “going grunge” not only stopped the fallout in my crown, but I regrew a bunch of hair.

*Ok. Thank you very much Mr Widows Peak for you time. I’m sure this info will be of great use to many. Cheers!"
*

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## rupe

> You are wasting your time, money and hair on bogus treatments that are not going to help you and avoiding the treatments that are most likely to help you.  That is why I say that.


 Rogaine is a proven treatment. I believe I have already mentioned that I tried finasteride but had to stop due to side effects or maybe you missed that part?

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## clandestine

This thread was not created for the purposes of discussing already available treatment options. Utilize the private messaging systems or a more relevant thread for said discussions.

Seriously not appreciating this thread being hijacked.

Please stay on topic. Thank you.

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## rupe

Thank Stressedtothebald. I will have a look and add it to my save the hair fund bill lol.

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## Tracy C

> Utilize the private messaging systems or a more relevant thread for said discussions.


 The direction this thread went was relevent because it was grounded around how Mr. rupe is coping with his hair loss.  Take a chill pill.

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## StressedToTheBald

> Thank Stressedtothebald. I will have a look and add it to my save the hair fund bill lol.


 You're welcome.

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## clandestine

> The direction this thread went was relevent because it was grounded around how Mr. rupe is coping with his hair loss.  Take a chill pill.


 Tracy, your logic astounds me sometimes.

Literally every post on the second page of this thread has to do with you and StressedToTheBald debating the efficacy of beta sitosterol versus finasteride. Protip: We've all seen it before elsewhere in the forums (i.e. no one cares anymore, you don't seem to be coming to any earth-shattering revelations regarding the subject any time soon).

For you to say such a debate is at all related to this thread's intention is a stretch. A massive one, at that. You come off as manipulative, at best. For the sake of others, don't act like you care about the topic at hand when all you've really come here to do is propagate your opinions.

Sorry if this sounded harsh. Take it as you will.

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## Tracy C

> Rogaine is a proven treatment. I believe I have already mentioned that I tried finasteride but had to stop due to side effects or maybe you missed that part?


 I didn't miss that.  I believe you are probably a victim of fear mongering.  Fear mongering is causing a lot of damage for those coping with hair loss.  Living with hair loss is tuff enough without all the fear mongering that is going on right now.  Shills from all those bogus hair loss products on the market are capitalizing on it.  They are taking advantage of your emotional state and doing everything they can to make sure you stay afraid.

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## Tracy C

> don't act like you care about the topic at hand when all you've really come here to do is propagate your opinions.


 You are completely and totally out of line.  I do care.  More than you realize.

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## 25 going on 65

A sub-forum of that kind might be a good idea. Even after successfully treating my hair loss for more than a year, I still find myself mentally struggling with it. There are still days when I feel like I can't even leave my home.

I think depression from hair loss is very understandable and natural, especially for those in their teens, 20's and 30's. There isn't really any other "benign" condition that so radically, rapidly changes the image of a young adult. It's a bit like losing most of your teeth in 5 years, or seeing your nose or ears double (or halve) in size. It's just this sudden and very visible transformation that isn't even lifestyle-related.. just bad luck in the genetic lottery.

And just to do my part in hijacking the thread further (sorry OP): I understand Tracy's frustration with fear mongering on this forum. Someone WILL visit this forum who could, with treatment, be a solid NW2 in 8-10 years from now - but instead will be a NW5 or 6 because they think they'll be permanently impotent otherwise (or some other nonsense like that).
Knowing first-hand how this condition affects our thoughts and emotions, I truly feel sorry for whoever that is. Tracy does too. That's why she hammers on these points; if she manages to save even one person's future, it's worth it.

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## Winston

I think a sub forum that sticks solely to the emotional issues related to hair loss is an excellent idea! Im sure if enough of us ask for it the administrators of this site will eventually add one.  Lets please stay on topic so this thread can be recognized by the admins of the forum.

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## clandestine

Feeling rather introverted lately. Continually self conscious in some respects. Worried about appearance in many social situations, anxiety kicks in pretty frequently.

Hm, been feeling more introverted since I've gone off to uni. Can't seem to shake negative thought patterns, though I can identify them.

How are you guys making out?

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## Maradona

> Feeling rather introverted lately. Continually self conscious in some respects. Worried about appearance in many social situations, anxiety kicks in pretty frequently.
> 
> Hm, been feeling more introverted since I've gone off to uni. Can't seem to shake negative thought patterns, though I can identify them.
> 
> How are you guys making out?


  man im same as you only difference that I'm still in College and ITS HELL to go to college for me but its my last semester !!! so everyone will probably remember me as the hairy guy if I can keep up with the hats and hiding as much as possible...good thing it's winter.

Another thing: i take the train at late night so it's less crowded thats how self concious I am.

I think we should sugest this idea of a sub forum in the bald truth show on sunday, its a great idea. However I think it would have like 1000 posts a day, idk if that could be bad. :Frown:

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## NotBelievingIt

> Feeling rather introverted lately. Continually self conscious in some respects. Worried about appearance in many social situations, anxiety kicks in pretty frequently.
> 
> Hm, been feeling more introverted since I've gone off to uni. Can't seem to shake negative thought patterns, though I can identify them.
> 
> How are you guys making out?


 If I'm alone, I think about my hair and strangely, I think about what others think even though there are no others - except the cats LOL.  And that constant thinking about it leads to the negative thoughts.

I've found myself feeling better when I'm around people and simply stop thinking about my hair and think about the situation and the other people.  Later I realize that I interacted with this person _as myself_ and that was who was reacted to.  Not my hair.

My advice to you would be to get the hell out of the dorm room.  Spend time around people and interact with them.  Especially at a university there has to be a social group you can join with like minded people about some hobby that you can talk about and enjoy an activity together.

Whats helped me since my "realization" back in October is going to a local indoor climbing gym and meeting some folks in classes.  The people there simply do not care and if they do or even notice, they do not express it in any way which is basically exactly the same.  I suppose it helps there is a good handful of regulars that have completed shaved it off, or have super short hair, so scalp isn't uncommon.

Its also been helpful that a couple of the friends I've met are good looking girls who climb with me, talk with me and laugh with me.  That kind of interaction is a positive and uplifting.

Repeat to yourself when you're feeling down:
Those That Matter Do Not Mind and Those That Mind Do Not Matter

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## Tracy C

> Can't seem to shake negative thought patterns, though I can identify them.
> 
> How are you guys making out?


 It certainly is not easy.  One of the tricks I've learned is to sit down and make a list of all the things that make me happy.  More often than not doing this has a snowball effect because each thing I write down reminds me of something else that makes me happy.

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## clandestine

Thanks for the replies everyone, as well as the support.

@Maradona; I think suggesting it on the bald truth talk to Spencer is a great idea. Try to stay strong my man.


@NotBelievingIt; Entirely true. Those that truly matter in life, won't mind. And those that do, don't matter. I think it's great you've taken up an interest in climbing. I've been a couple times myself, very fun.

"Later I realize that I interacted with this person as myself and that was who was reacted to. Not my hair."
This is a great statement man, very true indeed.

And yes, I probably need to get out of my dorm room more often. Unfortunately I've had an ear injury that prevents me from really going out at night/ listening to music (i.e. going downtown). Sorta been rough.

I realize the steps I need to take towards acceptance, non-resistance. Nonetheless, I often feel along in this struggle among my age group. 

Gotta be strong though, all we can do is try to be our best!


@Tracy C; Great tip Tracy. Reality is your focus, perception. We must remain grateful for that which we have in life. Wanted to apologize as well for my previous post in this thread towards you, I was frustrated at the time.

Also, I'd like to share this with you all.

http://8tracks.com/whatsyourname/i-w...ess-out-of-you

First couple songs are a great listen, rather inspirational. Brought my mood up.

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## clandestine

Got a haircut yesterday.

Felt good for a little while, but the hair loss is still noticeable. Really hits my confidence. This, mostly when I'm going out with friends or being around other people. Turning into a sort of social anxiety in some instances.

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## NotBelievingIt

> Got a haircut yesterday.
> 
> Felt good for a little while, but the hair loss is still noticeable. Really hits my confidence. This, mostly when I'm going out with friends or being around other people. Turning into a sort of social anxiety in some instances.


 Try not looking at yourself in the mirror.  Out of sight out of mind.

Of course as a guy that can be tough when you have to shave  :Smile:

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## clandestine

Just wrote a reply. A long one, rather decent. About 5 paragraphs about how I'm currently feeling. Pushed the wrong button on my keyboard somehow, lost it.

Somehow I feel it doesn't matter anyway. It was more just my thoughts, realizing how truly inhibited I am by this affliction. Then some what ifs, what if I were truly uninhibited? Imagining a scenario where I could maybe care less about hair loss.

Feels like I'm falling short of my potential. Losing sight of who I am as a person sometimes. Held back. This all sounds very dismal. Fact is, it is. I apologize.

I encourage you all to vent. However you're feeling currently. Good; bad; optimistic; ****ing pissed; apathetic; abysmal; high; low. Doesn't matter. Writing helps.

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## NotBelievingIt

Writing thoughts and feelings down is cathartic - so is talking to someone and just letting it spill.  It allows you to release emotions on your terms.

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## lucrio

About what clandestine said regarding losing out on potential. This is exactly how I feel. If my head was not always filled with worries about my hair and if hairloss was not inhibiting me from doing things I would be doing otherwise, it seems I could be accomplishing so much more. Before I began losing my hair I was able to be good at anything I put my mind to, now it seems that a portion of my brain function is constantly spent worrying and that losisng my hair makes me feel like an overall failure.

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## chrisis

I'm finding myself having second thoughts if friends ask me out somewhere. If I don't fix this I fear I will become a hairless hermit!  :Frown: 

Also tired of the wind recently. I didn't notice until recently how windy my city is. You can get an umbrella for rain, but with wind you can do nothing!!!

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## NotBelievingIt

> Also tired of the wind recently. I didn't notice until recently how windy my city is. You can get an umbrella for rain, but with wind you can do nothing!!!


 Best defense against wind and rain is to just keep it short such that any minor "swish" can be easily hand fixed.

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## chrisis

I look best with my hair grown out a bit or I'd definitely have it shorter.

I just realised that straightening my hair makes it much more susceptible to wind, so may stop doing that.... at least until after my ht.

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## clandestine

> I look best with my hair grown out a bit or I'd definitely have it shorter.
> 
> I just realised that straightening my hair makes it much more susceptible to wind, so may stop doing that.... at least until after my ht.


 Interesting, you've decided to go the route of HT? Does this not however require continual use of propecia post-op?

Hows your endeavour to experiment with lower dosages going, chrisis?

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## chrisis

> Interesting, you've decided to go the route of HT? Does this not however require continual use of propecia post-op?
> 
> Hows your endeavour to experiment with lower dosages going, chrisis?


 I'm not touching finasteride again until I'm happy that my sides are totally gone. I think things are getting better, so maybe I'll start on 0.25mg in a few weeks. 

If I can't tolerate finasteride, I'll just have to use minoxidil, Nizoral shampoo and some of the other supplements outside of the big 3, e.g. zinc, maybe saw palmetto (if I don't get sides).

I'm also keeping an eye on Replicel and other companies. If they come out with something promising, then it's possible any future hairloss could be remedied at a cellular level. It's gonna take a few years to come to market, so I doubt I'll be waiting that long even if they get 100% success! 

So long as I get my hairline sorted, I feel relatively confident given, a) my comparatively minor balding pattern at age 28, and b) advances in therapies, that I will be ok  :Smile:

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## clandestine

Great attitude, stay hopeful mate.Hope your sides subside (no pun intended). 

Saw palmetto might be an option. I've contemplated using it myself. Along with beta sitosterol, or whatever it was STTB was pushing. Problem is I've had sexual sides on SSRI's in the past, and am skeptical to use anything that might have negative effects in that respect. Especially not propecia, regardless of potential risk.

I've been trying out nanogen fibres for the last little while. I've been generally happy with them, aside from the fact they don't necessarily work the best on the hairline or where my temples are slick bald.

Try em out maybe, if you're up for it. Hey, if women are allowed makeup, we should be allowed concealers too!  :Wink:

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## chrisis

Thanks for the tip but I don't think concealers or fibres would be any good for me. I don't have any loss at the crown, just receded hair!

Touch wood my crown will be ok. I talked to my mum at the weekend she said her Dad had similar hair to me - receded but not bald at the back. He died around age 40 though.

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## clandestine

Going out for my 20th birthday tomorrow! To wear a hat, or not to wear a hat? That, is the question.

I oftentimes feel as if I'm judged less harshly by people I don't know if I'm wearing one. Could be a cognitive distortion, who knows.

Maybe I'm thinking about my hair much more fervently than most, but I do strongly believe girls are going for guys who they find most (generally) attractive. This considered, my receded hairline is not exactly one of my best qualities.  :Smile: 

So, hat or no hat, what says baldtruth?

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## NotBelievingIt

At the age of 20, majority of *girls* are going to be vain.  Most will not have figured out what a man actually is.

Never know, the receding hairline etc might just attract a cougar.  Go Au Natural Man!  :Smile:

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## chrisis

It totally depends! It's a personal decision. If you feel better with a hat - wear it. Unless I knew you personally I couldn't really advise in terms of how you look.

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## clandestine

Ay, ****. Shouldn't be having to think about this on my birthday. Thanks for the support regardless, guys. Been a rough year sort of.

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## Maradona

> Ay, ****. Shouldn't be having to think about this on my birthday. Thanks for the support regardless, guys. Been a rough year sort of.


 Im really afraid of the future im shedding like a mofo, looking myself in the mirror is gonna be so ****ing depressing.

I think it just better to shave it all off and not having to look at a high ass hairline.

Gotta love the winter though!!

PS: you guys should come to the chat of tomorrow's bald truth show and suggest Spencer for a subforum. A sub forum like this could really help some of us get through this much easier and even EMBRACE the baldness which is what I'm trying to do....

Happy birthday bro ! srry for being late :S, sure there are still things we can appreciate : ), hope you enjoyed it.

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## clandestine

> Im really afraid of the future im shedding like a mofo, looking myself in the mirror is gonna be so ****ing depressing.
> 
> I think it just better to shave it all off and not having to look at a high ass hairline.
> 
> Gotta love the winter though!!
> 
> PS: you guys should come to the chat of tomorrow's bald truth show and suggest Spencer for a subforum. A sub forum like this could really help some of us get through this much easier and even EMBRACE the baldness which is what I'm trying to do....
> 
> Happy birthday bro ! srry for being late :S, sure there are still things we can appreciate : ), hope you enjoyed it.


 Much love, mate. Ended up wearing a hat for a bit of it, but didn't in other occasions! About half and half, or a little less than half without hat, a little more with.

Great suggestion, by the way.

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## itssomuchfun

I think the hardest thing about hair loss has been my perceptions on dating and love. My hair loss was slow and pretty much unnoticed until a long-term relationship of mine ended. Since then it's been pretty rapid for almost 8 months now.  It's made me feel like hell because I've never been all that confident and now with hair loss it's hard for me to remain realistic about finding someone for the future.  It's the idea that you'll be disqualified by so many people you meet.  That's true before hair loss as people are attracted to a certain build or height, but as others have mentioned, hair loss just seems to come out of nowhere and drastically change the way you look. You had a whole lifetime to get used to your height and build and those are likely to change, but your hair does.  Does anyone else feel that their thoughts about relationships are the hardest thing to overcome?

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## NotBelievingIt

> I think the hardest thing about hair loss has been my perceptions on dating and love. My hair loss was slow and pretty much unnoticed until a long-term relationship of mine ended. Since then it's been pretty rapid for almost 8 months now.  It's made me feel like hell because I've never been all that confident and now with hair loss it's hard for me to remain realistic about finding someone for the future.  It's the idea that you'll be disqualified by so many people you meet.  That's true before hair loss as people are attracted to a certain build or height, but as others have mentioned, hair loss just seems to come out of nowhere and drastically change the way you look. You had a whole lifetime to get used to your height and build and those are likely to change, but your hair does.  Does anyone else feel that their thoughts about relationships are the hardest thing to overcome?


 I feel similar.

I've had few relationships and the most recent one, while it ended badly, it didn't end "badly"...heh

But what sucks is, right after that I started looking through pics to put on match.com and thats when it dawned on me I'm losing my hair...and I swear, it has accelerated since..or maybe its just that I'm actually paying attention to my hair more now.

That connection of a relationship ending at the same time discovering my hair loss will never be forgotten unfortunately, I hate that it has been made in my mind also.

What really stinks is that I'm at a point in my life where its beginning to actually matter to me - wanting to find love and a life mate.

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## mnx

I agree this deserves a sub forum. I'm the sort of person who usually conceals his feelings, but I feel gutted at the prospect of losing my hair. Plus with the relative anonymity of the web, what is the use of hiding your pain and keeping a noble silence.

As for relationships, yeah it is a concern. Truth is I asked a girl out a week ago in the midst of my hair loss anxiety and had a real nice time. I feel like my anxiety of the hair loss is a shadow that is threatening my enjoyment of life though. I didn't affect me too much during the date, but I've been so overwhelmed with anxiety and depression that I am afraid it is going to spoil what could be a nice thing going on.

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## NotBelievingIt

> I didn't affect me too much during the date


 I don't mean to sound rude or anything, but of course it didn't!

For the same reason when I go to my local indoor climbing gym my hair doesn't even enter my mind.  I'm so focused on something I enjoy that requires, well, focus heh, that I simply end up not caring about my own hair.  This is a good thing.  Yes, its always "there" in the back of my mind (evidenced by the fact I notice the balding/bald guys at the gym and the kids with huge amounts of hair) but it doesn't enter my active train of thought.




> , but I've been so overwhelmed with anxiety and depression that I am afraid it is going to spoil what could be a nice thing going on.


 I'm beginning to realize that the biggest problem we have is a wandering mind.  When there is nothing to focus our minds, "hair" comes front and center.  Often times this is a mental thing that needs to be overcome.

Monday was a great day for me, I didn't "think" about it at all.  Tuesday though?  For whatever reason it got into my head on the way into work and just wouldn't leave.

In some ways this forum is good, and others its terrible because it makes us think about the very thing we wish we wouldn't obsess about.

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## mnx

> I don't mean to sound rude or anything, but of course it didn't!
> 
> For the same reason when I go to my local indoor climbing gym my hair doesn't even enter my mind.  I'm so focused on something I enjoy that requires, well, focus heh, that I simply end up not caring about my own hair.  This is a good thing.  Yes, its always "there" in the back of my mind (evidenced by the fact I notice the balding/bald guys at the gym and the kids with huge amounts of hair) but it doesn't enter my active train of thought.
> 
> 
> 
> I'm beginning to realize that the biggest problem we have is a wandering mind.  When there is nothing to focus our minds, "hair" comes front and center.  Often times this is a mental thing that needs to be overcome.
> 
> Monday was a great day for me, I didn't "think" about it at all.  Tuesday though?  For whatever reason it got into my head on the way into work and just wouldn't leave.
> ...


 You're right on both counts. To be honest I think I need to stay off this site and stop thinking about my hair.

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## tbtadmin

As requested we've started a new forum category dedicated to the topic of "Coping With Hair Loss In Everyday Life." Learning to deal with the emotional aspects of hair loss is a big part of our daily struggle and we hope this new addition to the forum provides a place to gain strength and inspiration from others.

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## Tracy C

> I'm finding myself having second thoughts if friends ask me out somewhere. If I don't fix this I fear I will become a hairless hermit!


 Don't do that.  I did that for a decade.  I will never get that decade back.  Find a way to live with it so you can live your life.  I know it's hard but trust me, it can be done.

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## clandestine

> As requested we've started a new forum category dedicated to the topic of "Coping With Hair Loss In Everyday Life." Learning to deal with the emotional aspects of hair loss is a big part of our daily struggle and we hope this new addition to the forum provides a place gain strength and inspiration from others.


 Incredible. Thank you, from all of us around the forums.

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## clandestine

Went the whole weekend without wearing a hat! Figure it better not to hide what hair I have. Little battles; make small daily progress.

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## chrisis

Had a good weekend myself, someone complimented me on my hair and how it looked good in a quiff. For him it was probably a casual remark, but it made my night. Last time someone made a comment was to say it was receded, but I think combination of the minoxidil helping thicken the hairline and learning to style it better has helped a lot.

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## jgold

I don't know if this will help any of you but it realllly helped me and is still helping me get over the hair loss sadness.

ONE DAY YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BE HERE, ON EARTH, AND YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO LIVE IN THIS LIFE AND BE A HUMAN BEING. 

I know this is something that almost everyone thinks about, but really let it marinate. Really let it soak in. Everything around you is gong to be gone one day and you will never be able to get it back, ever. The people around you, the earth, the beauty. 

This simple thought helps me in almost every situation and really has helped me to overcome my fears. Try it out. Hopefully it will really influence you to have a positive outlook on almost everything. I hope.

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## Maradona

> I don't know if this will help any of you but it realllly helped me and is still helping me get over the hair loss sadness.
> 
> ONE DAY YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BE HERE, ON EARTH, AND YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO LIVE IN THIS LIFE AND BE A HUMAN BEING. 
> 
> I know this is something that almost everyone thinks about, but really let it marinate. Really let it soak in. Everything around you is gong to be gone one day and you will never be able to get it back, ever. The people around you, the earth, the beauty. 
> 
> This simple thought helps me in almost every situation and really has helped me to overcome my fears. Try it out. Hopefully it will really influence you to have a positive outlook on almost everything. I hope.


 Extremly good advice, my broseph  :Smile:  !

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## clandestine

Turned down going out tonight. Partially cause I could do some work, moreso because I've been feeling really down about my hair loss these last couple days. Had a terrible dream last night that involved hair loss, as well. ****, etc.

It's Friday, everyone is out. I feel so sorry for my self; I know this is wrong, only further perpetuates my depressive state. Not coping well as of late.

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## chrisis

Sorry to hear this clandestine. I went out but was ever paranoid about my hair. 

Wish you the best!

Please try not to let it beat you.

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## clandestine

Thanks for the well wishes, chrisis, much appreciated. Glad you're getting out man, even if you were a little paranoid. All the best.

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## DAVE52

> I feel so sorry for my self; I know this is wrong, only further perpetuates my depressive state. Not coping well as of late.


 I haveb't been coping well for years and Im much older than youtrself
THis hairloss has consumed friggen  my life
I don'ty let people get close to me because of it 
I avoid situations at all costs 
Ruined my life and I admit it's all my fault for lettting it get the better of me  
I had 1 HT 12 yrs ago an aas expected further hairloss has occurred so much so that I have now the dreaded " bald crwon"
The Ht last OK for about 8 yrs 
I have no desire to go back for further surgeries 
I 've reviewed everything and I dont want to take the chance that the next surgery will result ina huge scar , shock loss, plus I know the results will still give a thin look
Right now Im down to a 2 guard and no visible signs of the scar ...a small indentation on the right side but you have to know what u are looking for to nocice it 
Every day is a chore for me
Wake up, shower and try to style the mess on my head so it looks presentable 
Sometimes I think getting the HT was the stupidest thing I ever did but I have to admit going completly bald just scared the shit out of me

Now I m goign through thoughts of buzzing it to a 1 guard but I am equally terrired the scar will scream " HA I R T R A N S P L A N T " !!! :Frown: 

I had some other fellows e-mail me pics of their head after they shave after a HT 

They are happier than ever now but Im not sure I could deal with a giant friggen scar on my head for everyone to see

Look at Joe roggan ( comedian and UFA announcer ) he got fed up and shaved it

http://ninjasplace.forumotion.net/t1...an-shaved-head

I tried a shrink , depressions pills , a psycotherapist to talk to , long hair , short hair.
I just get get over it how uncomfortable I feel 

Yea Im f*cked up and I know it

At least I got good job , Im healthy and I have a roof over my head

Thanks for letting me vent for today 

For the rest of you try to deal with it head on ( no pun intended ) - just buzz it off .

Don't try to fight something that you have little chance of winning

Youy will need 3 4, 5 HT's to get good coverage ( see Joetronic , Spex )  or else you'll have a HT that is basically a glorifed comb over with a bald crown

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## Scorpion

I'm NOT coping with no ****ing hair loss!

**** THE SYSTEM!

As soon as my hair decides it's time to go, my body will go with it...LITERALLY.

I shall thrust a knife in my jugular vein and fall from the skyscraper.

If my genes can't at least save my hair, then **** THEM.

**** this shit body. I hate myself and I hate my parents for creating such an inferior being!

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## chrisis

:EEK!: 

This is not a good attitude or approach.

The way I see it at my age, 28, having a transplant now buys me time - time to continue enjoying my image and whatever youth I have left. Time to socialise, excel in life and meet new people and a partner.

If I bald any further, then I guess I'll have to finance more treatments, but it's worth bearing in mind that within 5-10 years time we may have some new treatments, and maybe a cure. Until then I'd be using minoxidil and whatever else to give me as good a chance of "hanging on" for as long as possible. Worst case scenerio: I have a FUT at age 28 and by the time I'm finished paying for it, I need further work. So what? I'll just get more FUE and buy even more time!

Obviously it's a personal decision and circumstances different from person to person. I realise I'm lucky that I'm still relatively young and my hair loss is slow. I have also made maintaining my hair (and appearance overall) a priority. I don't have a car or mortgage and don't plan on getting married and having kids. I can therefore probably afford to spend some money now and then on this problem, and I believe it's worth it in my case. I acknowledge if you're older and/or your hair loss is more advanced, then it might not be worth it.

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## Stuntz

> I don't have a car or mortgage


 very OT, but wow not having a car makes things very hard don´t u think?  I mean, in the relationships department. Much harder than hair loss I guess.

Take me for example: also on foot (no car), managed to get just one girl in 2 years. Of course this is coupled with my hair loss to reach such pitiful celibacy situation. But I know that I´ve lost at least 3 opportunities due to the lack of car.

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## chrisis

Depends. Having a car in the UK is not as important as it is in America. Smaller country with better public transport. I can potentially travel the length of the country within a few hours on train or by plane. You'd be lucky to get out of state in America.

Also, in my situation I have a central city flat and the city itself has a good light rail system. There are few situations I'd need a car for and my apartment doesn't offer anywhere to park anyway.

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